Friday, 15 January 2010

Men's top sexual complaints about women..

When I was sent this article, it was in jest. After reading through Men's top sexual complaints about women, it was hard not to take the defensive line. 

In fact, I am sick and tired of men placing the blame for little or poor sex at the feet of women.

Let's see what they, men, have to say for themselves:

Women are not kinky enough.
Plain old vanilla sex is fun, but women need to remember that it's okay to get a little crazy now and then. Try something different. Men are more turned on by the forbidden.

Men's fantasies are light-years ahead and from a teenage age are filled with desires, I am guessing fuelled in part by porn, peer-competitiveness and sheer hormones.  As I recall the words threesomes and anal being tossed around the classroom with ease, unrealistic and improbable ease, but ease all the same.  
Men, the next time we dress up for you, take that as a sign, reassure us, and try your fantasies one step at a time, starting from tame, rather than going from A straight to Z (there are 24 in between before asking us if we have heard of 'scat'!).

Women think it's rude when we nap post-climax.
Orgasms differ between men and women, and a man's orgasm uses much more energy. We release hormones when we climax. Did you ever consider the possibility that you've simply worn us out?

Being worn out is good for us too, a job well done!  And believe me, if you had worn us out, we would be snoozing there right next to you.  I have never complained about a man napping post-climax when, to be crass, I had got off too!

Women want more foreplay.
You may think we don't give you enough, and this may be true, but you need to tell us when you want more, and what you want. Men are usually ready to listen - especially if you say it in a naughty voice - and we will cooperate. We've got you in bed, more than likely at least partially nude...don't get shy now.

Foreplay can start at any time.  Do yourself a favour, send a saucy text or email.  Leave a post-it note of your favourite pair of her knickers.  Give her a deep, prolonged kiss.  Get those juices flowing.  What is that saying?  Men can be likened to a blow torch, switch on, immediately hot.  Women are like an oven - pre-heat!

There is such a thing as sex without a commitment.
Yes, men are like animals. Sometimes we really just want sex - no intimacy, no promise of a phone call tomorrow. It seems that when we can find a "friend" who wants nothing but sex, even she gets upset when we don't call her.

You know what?  Women like sex without commitment too!  What they don't like is having commitment dangled like a carrot in order to gain sex.  Be upfront, in order to get up her front without deception.

ore frequency, please!
How can women last so long without sex? Months can go by and they feel nothing. No urge, no boredom sex, no mention of it. I will never understand this phenomenon.

Personally I find the more women have sex, the more they want it and vice versa.  Set aside time for loving, and reap the rewards.  A hint:  If a women has housework, or errands to do, chip in and help out.  The sooner they are done, the more time you will have together.

Men always have to make the first move.
This applies to relationships, dancing, and sex. Put yourselves on the line. Show us your confidence. A strong woman is sexy.

Stop complaining and make the move.  We have gone into no man's land, so much so, neither sex want to be the initiator.  Be the man, even the Girl's Guide to Girls should help!  And we'll try and do the same, well I will, I can't speak for all of us!

Women get upset when we can't understand their anatomy.
Let's make a comparison: men's bodies and women's bodies. I think I've made my point. Look at how complex your bodies are compared to ours. The mystery only holds our attention for so long. Do you want us to understand it? Give us lessons. If we act out, you can give us detention.

Maybe if men listened to the anatomy lesson, rather than zone out after breast and vagina,  try passing go and collect 200!  It's all about communication and patience.  Women need to feel comfortable before explaining where all the secret buttons are and how they should be used. Sometimes just asking makes all the difference, show that you care enough to want to know her body.

Too aggressive for this time in the morning?  Maybe I should have waited until my first coffee!


  1. Great post and very all of it is very true. I love how you point out that if blokes help with jobs that it will mean there's more time for sex. Now there's an incentive I hadn't thought of before. I will remember that one in case I ever need it in the future.
    Thanks :-)

    Kate x

  2. Speaking of foreplay - there is nothing better and sexier than coming home to find all the housework done and a meal cooked for you! Makes a woman think of forgetting the meal and heading straight to the bedroom...

  3. My god, was that article written half a century ago? It's genuinely depressing that there are even still men that claim to be well-educated in 21st century sex, yet adhere to the old-fashioned views mentioned to which (as you highlighted) there have been counter-arguements for quite some time now.

    I've slowly been educating the men I know in the joys of erotic literature (nothing wrong with a bit of porn of course, but come on... how many pneumatic screamers do you know that howl and squirt?). There is way too much expectation on women to be sexual goddesses, like the images shoved down our throats constantly. A little imagination from men as well wouldn't go amiss..

    An interesting blog :)